“Everyday I write the book”

I want to be a writer when I grow up.  I want to have words for every thought of mine oh wait, I guess I already do… I want to enlighten the day with emotion and explanation of nonsense.  I want to be read and understood or at least “almost” understood.  I want to be famous with a book deal and travel to bookstores and drink tea and sign my “trademark” just like this:

Photo Dec 22, 7 19 19 PM

and I want to write more.  about me.  about my loves.  about my passions.  and I want to go on talking and laughing and being me with the sassy hair and the 12 year old voice.

“Ummm, Mmm-icole, since you’re 26 and wear grown up nail polish, that means you’re a grown up, right?  Even if you burn our pancakes?” <stumbles over thoughts> “Umm… yeah, Keri, I guess that’s what it means….”

Shoot.  I guess that means I missed the boat on becoming a writer…. <giggles beneath the sound of fingers on a keyboard.> 

I don’t share this a lot, but my mom reminded me a few weeks ago that I rejected a scholarship for writing.  She reminded me that the President of USA TODAY, himself, tried to recruit me when I was only a senior in high school.  and so you know, part of me feels a little bit prideful in sharing that–but today, that’s okay.

ps. I’d like to give a public shout out to my 7th grade English teacher who assigned a lot of writing.  I’m thinking that’s where I got my start.  Miss Million, I still love you.

Truth is, I’m already a writer.  That’s become more and more evident this last year as I’ve recorded every part of my growth, every emotion of my life, and every word of my strength and weakness.  So here I am, Nicole Paullin, the writer.  Darlings, you’ve helped make me that.  hey, thanks!

As I tend to do, I’ve hit the pause button on my life to stop and recollect.  Plus, the year is at a close, and I need to find my lessons here and now because I’m just that determined.  

Here’s what I’ve come up with:

It’s okay to fail.  just be sure to pick yourself up and try again.

“Things” get in the way, it’s okay to not finish what you started out to do.  just be sure to redirect where you need to go to finish.

There is goodness in all things with “badness” even if we can’t see them in the moment.  Look harder (like Simba did right before Rafiki smacked him on the head).  “Ahh yes, the past can hurt.  But the way I see it, you can either run from it, or learn from it.”  

Life goes on.  Go with it.  and smile while you do, because we only have one life to try.

2013 is 8 days away.  I’m excited.  So excited that I’ve decided to start it 8 days early.  I mean, someone has to continue the Mayan calendar….

Here’s how I’ve started: I’ve created a new look on my blog (and organized it) in prep for the writer in me to go just a little more wild, with pinterest ideas coming out of my ears, with organizing tips that you’ll love, with baked goods that will make this ass of mine and yours a tiny bit bigger but a lot bit happier.

God may be the author of my life, but I’m the writer.

And this morning I write to you with a little Lenny Kravitz in the background, a little The Cure telling me it’s Friday and I’m in love (even though it’s Sunday and I don’t think I am), a little Elvis Costello telling me he’s writing the book everyday.

Nah, Elvis.  I am.  But thanks for inspiring me because,

I’m a woman on a mission in two or three editions.

let's behold

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